Today we are going to consider how to raise an independent child
Raising a child in the current time is a lot different than it was for our parents, and we need to be prepare to encourage resileice rather than excpexct to just develop. While the basic essence of good parenting is still the same, you might have to take a slightly different approach than they did towards raising your child into a healthy, functioning and self-reliant adult.
How to raise an independent child
Read on to discover 5 of the most effective actionable steps you can take to raise an independent child.
Allow them to Sit in Discomfort
It may come as a surprise, but sometimes the best help is no help at all. Every once in a while, instead of jumping in and saving the day, allow your little one to fail and sit in that discomfort. This will help them develop critical problem-solving skills which will help later in life.
Take a look at my book Create Your Own Happy – it equips kids with the skills to raise their own happiness levels and develop self-reliance and resilience.
Empower them to be an independent child
Parents that delay their child’s independence are doing them no favours, and if you’re jumping and doing things for your kid at every single instance, you’re raising them into a helpless, powerless individual.
Empower them by allowing thm to make small decisions and then deal with their after-effects. Remember that when your kid is growing up, it is much like climbing a wall- they will need to take all those steps and efforts by themselves to truly grow and enjoy the victory at the top. You want them to enjoy being productive and adults filled with confidence
Practise Autonomy – Supportive Parenting when trying to raise an independent child
This one is exactly what it sounds like- when you attempt to handle and monitor every single aspect of your kid’s life and are not offering them any control, you’re raising them without the power to make decisions and creating an invisible dependency on you. Instead, when you practise autonomy-supportive parenting, you’re basically raising your child to be more persistent in the face of failures and setbacks, and be more independent in general. This will benefit them for life,
Take a look at Be Happy Be You the teenage guide to happiness – it equips teems with lots of skills to navigate teen life and increase their self-reliance
Expect Mistakes, Provide Feedback – is how to raise an independent child
When you hand over the control to your kid, you have to brace yourself for some mistakes to be made too. It’s obvious. Don’t rush to offer feedback- even if it is constructive criticism. Instead, allow them to take their time to absorb the situation and make sense of it, and then offer feedback on how things could have been done a different way, without pressuring them into it.
Resist the urge to lecture your kid- no matter what.
Allow them to Handle Tough Emotions
Children may be small but have big feelings. As a parent, your instinct might be to protect him from those scary, uncertain feelings as much as you can. But if you keep doing that, your child is never going to be able to learn how to do it on his own right? Don’t stunt your child’s emotional growth- allow them to handle those emotions themself, but still be there for support when they need you to!
Have a look at Create Your own Calm ( pre-order available) for lots of activities your child can practise to learn to manage their own big feelings – a key step when trying to raise an independent child
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If you have any tips on how to raise an independent child do please drop me a comment below